I Walk The Line
by drooldevil
Summary: John Schuyler Moore is a respected illustrator at the New York Times, Doctor Laszlo Kreizler is known as an alienist. What happens when the pressure of Johns feelings outweighs the pressures forced upon him by society.


John Moore woke with a start. Sweat trickling slowly down his forehead as his eyes darted around the room looking for an unknown attacker. This is how he'd awoken every night since the killer had been caught. He knew he was safe, the monster had been shot right before his eyes, but still the man haunted his mind. John shook his head as if to dislodge the dream still racing through his mind and let his thoughts wonder to the other man that haunted him.  
Doctor Laszlo Kreizler.  
The brilliant alienist haunted his every waking thought. Along with some of his dreams too. But the good doctor would never know how he felt, John thought to himself. Grimacing at the thought of Laszlo's reaction to his feelings. He knew he'd never be accepted, he knew he'd be shunned. Maybe even institutionalised.  
John sighed again and stretched his hands above his head, swinging his legs out of bed and into the wooden floor of his bedroom suit. He made he was over to his washbasin and splashed the cool water over his face and neck. Sighing in relief he grabbed the hand towel and dabbed himself dry, finally looking into the mirror. He looked like he hadn't slept at all, his eyes were red and sunken. He decided to brace himself and get ready for the day. Putting on one of his most comfy, yet threadbare, suits. He didn't want to be uncomfortable in his clothes as well as his mind. He knew his was spending the afternoon with Laszlo but he had yet to decide what to do with the rest of his morning, as if answering his thoughts he heard a knock on his door and as it opened he heard a familiar voice, "I pray that you're decent John Moore." It was Sara. John smiled to himself, in another world they would have been the perfect match. But as it was she was a member of the weaker sex, which John did not find himself attracted to.  
"I am indeed." he replied, turning to face her and smiling. He saw her face drop immediately as she looked him over.  
"What in heavens name happened to you John," she asked, walking tentatively into the room. John chuckled slightly and stifled a yawn.  
"Nothing, dear Sara, just had a rough nights sleep." he spoke truthfully as he rubbed his neck. In response Sara pressed her lips together in a thin line.  
"Still having the dreams?" She asked softly and John nodded slowly, sighing, glad to have someone to talk to about at least part of what was troubling him.  
"Yes," he replied simply.  
Sara studied him closely and he fidgeted on his not yet booted feet.

"So am I John, so don't fret. We're all in the same boat here," Sara reached out and patted John's arm fondly. He smiled a small smile in response and looked at Sara's hand resting on his arm. Maybe in another world, John thought to himself, maybe I could tell her, maybe she would understand. John's mind was racing, he yearned to share his feelings with another being but he knew he couldn't. What he hadn't realised was Sara, studying him as his mind whirred. She took his hand and lead him to the bed, sitting down and patting the sheets next to her as if she was in her own room. John sat as instructed and looked at her.

"John, dear, what on earth is wrong with you," Sara pried and he knew he would cave. Even so he shook his head. Sara fixed him with one of her looks and John exhaled loudly.

"Sara, I could never tell you. You'd think me insane, you'd think me repulsive." John muttered quietly. Sara signed but said nothing, waiting for him to continue.

John worried his bottom lip between his teeth as he thought about how to proceed.

"A smart woman, such as yourself, knows about today's attitudes towards those who have particular interests... sexually." John started, breathing heavily and wringing his hands together. Sara's hands came into view, cupping his own and therefore stilling his movements. John looked up as he heard Sara laugh lightly.

"John Schuyler Moore, if you about to tell me that you have feelings towards a certain member of the same sex as yourself then you must immediately calm your worrying. I figured it out as soon as I saw the way you two were together. Hence why I refused your proposal." Sara laughed again and the sound lit up Johns heart.

John laughed along with her and let his smile light up his eyes, for the first time in a long while, John was truly happy. He reached across to his nightstand and picked up his cigarette case, pulling one out for himself and one for Sara.

"So, shall we get a spot of breakfast?" John asked his friend as he lit his cigarette, taking a long, calming drag.


End file.
